The struggle

Have you ever thought that things would be better if only you knew what the future held? Then I would have known not to freak out last night.

Last night, in preparation for my two exams today, I struggled so hard to stay awake and make sense of what I was reading. All in vain. Sort of. I spent so many hours doing things to make sure I was preparing for the exams: I cancelled dinner dates, lunch dates, hang out time just so I could put myself in the best possible position to succeed.

But all to no avail. Not much was accomplished yesterday. Quite saddening. (God and I still have to talk about that), but this morning I woke up and cranked out the paper in 2 hours (5 pages) and spent time with God just thanking Him and realizing how much life does not depend on me.

Maybe that's it...I can't control life. Only He can. I know that, but maybe He was reminding me....idk. It still doesn't make sense to me.

As I head back to my studying, I just want to wish you all the best in whatever it is you've got to do today. No matter how difficult it is, ask God for motivation and a reason to keep on the grind.

Much love, peace and elbow grease,

       Ife 'Quipayan' S.

In Love

They say
"Love is blind!" 

I don't know who 'they' is, but love should not be blind.

I understand what it's supposed to mean: Love does not see the negative things in others.
I also understand that to be unhealthy. If I see my brother eating sand and choking, I'm not just going to let him continue because I love him and chose to overlook the negative. Love sees the negative, addresses it, and learns to forgive it.

"Love is patient, love is kind." Why don't we live by these rules? Love keeps loving in spite of the negative. Love is not only for romantic relationships and love is not just expressed physically.

Jesus met up with this woman at the well in John 4. She was basically the outcast of the outcasts. Even the marginalized people didn't like her. She was a Samaritan and a woman.

I want to point out is how Jesus shows His love. (Note: love is shown, not just talked about or thought about). She asks Him to provide her with a life source that never runs out: living water! He agrees and the dialogue goes down like this:

Jesus says, "Go, call your husband and come back."
She replies, "uh...I have no husband."
Jesus agrees, "You are right when you say you have no husband. The fact is, you have had five husbands, and the man you now have is not your husband. What you have just said is quite true."
[Insert your response here]

The conversation continues (read the rest here!!). But the point is, Jesus calls her out, because He loves her. He's not trying to get a good laugh, nor does want to hurt her. He touches that sore spot so she can realize that love is not blind to her pain, her shame or her sin.

So, tell me again why love is supposed to be blind?

He wants to heal the pain, take away the shame and keep us from sin. That's the kind of love I want. Don't you? *If you're not feeling this love and what to, holla at me. We can talk.*


Deuces,
   Ife 'Quipayan' S.

P.S. I'm just feeling extra loved today because God sees me (in all my nastiness and downfalls) and still loves.  Welps...gotta go write this paper and study me some Arabic. Chao or should I say Ma'salaama!?

Me, myself and I

"I........." How many times a day do we start our sentences with 'I' or construct strings of sentences with the word 'I' in it? It's hard to avoid it, I know. It's important that we use 'I' for several reasons such as giving someone your point of view or sharing the most riveting experience of something that happened to you. Then there are situations when we insert the 'I' unnecessarily. Someone is talking about their day (because you asked) and they pause for two seconds and you pick up where they left off. Observe:

You: Hey, Julie! How are you?
Julie: Great, fam. I just ran into my ex-boyfriend and he's not angry with me anymore. I was going to uh (pause)
You: Wait. What?! He said what? If I were you, I would have walked away right there. You know it wasn't your fault, so why does he think he has to forgive you?!Who does he think he is? I wish my ex-boyfriend would come up to me and say he's not mad. Let him be mad. I don't care!
Julie: (pause)......it's not about you.

This situation happened to me once. Really humbling and kinda awkward. My friend was right. It wasn't about me. Nor did he ask for my input. He was simply telling me a story that all I needed to do was listen.

(See how many times 'I' has been used by me?)

I'm trying to learn to think less of myself. Especially as a Christian. 2 Corinthians 2: 1-5 touches on the fact that what we have to say does not compare with what God has to say. The more we think that we are providing the greatest information or even good information, we should check ourselves. What is God saying? Seriously...

"When I came to you, brothers, I didn't no come with eloquence or superiors wisdom as I proclaimed to you the testimony about God." vs. 1 --Paul is saying that what he brought to the table, is nothing. He had to eloquence or superior wisdom. But what he testified to was what made the difference. When we start testifying about ourselves and looking inwardly, we can truly bring the Kingdom and look outwardly.

Take a step back. Read 1Cor. 2 for yourself. Recognize it's not about 'I'. Speak words that testify to God's person. 


Much love, peace, and outward-looking grease,
           Ife 'Quipayan' S. 


P.S. It's reading week and exams officially start on Thursday, but I have one everyday this week. Great. Only God can take me through....I should really stop focusing on what I can do and look to what God is capable of doing. Looking outward.

Grace on grace on grace: Thanksgiving Special

Thank you.

Thank you for your love that is relentless and the gentle way you wake me up every morning. I do not take it for granted.

I will thank you on this blog, I will thank you in my classes and I will thank you in the presence of my hommies.

You've turned my rough mornings into noteworthy afternoons, making it as if I didn't just roll out of bed and run to class.

You've turned places of hurt into arenas of joy and peace. Where there was no life, you stepped in and breathed your life.

I thank you for taking me through those valleys and for loving me enough to not leave me there.
I thank you for giving me the type of joy that doesn't dwindle with the tossing of the waves or with the onslaught of homework.

This semester has been grace on grace on grace on grace. And for that I thank you.

Thanking God does not start with Thanksgiving, I know, but let's take this time to really sit, listen, remember, and thank.

Psalm 107:31-43

I deeply desire that you find reasons to be thankful this time of the year and recognize how blessed you are, so...

Much love, peace and thankfulness grease,

     Ife 'Quipayan' S.

Penny for your thoughts (well mine)

Sometimes I’m not sure people want to hear my thoughts. In life we’re encouraged to be bold, speak up, stand for something, let your voice be heard, but, they never let us know how to be in situations when people don’t want to hear it. Sometimes, I’m not sure people want to hear my thoughts.

I consider myself to be quite thoughtful, as in full of thought. I think often and deeply. I think about yesterday, I think about tomorrow, I think about the boy that just sat beside me and I think about what my face looks like from someone else’s perspective. I ponder about love and about selfishness. I ruminate about my failures and my successes (sometimes too frequently). I chew over the things I’ve forgotten and the things I never let go.

I think. A lot. But I wander if people ever want to know what I’m thinking. I’d love to share it with them. That’s probably why I write so much. If only I could automatically take my thoughts and sprinkle them on this canvas, if only I could empty my brain and pick through the ripe thoughts, the interestingly neglected ones, the bothersome ones. If only.

To stop thinking, would that be so wrong? If for one day, I chose not to sit and think or let my mind wander, would that be so wrong? I’m too curious for such an act. I’d lose control of my mouth and have enemies lined up at my door.

My thoughts are valuable, well, the mature ones at least. I’m not sure about the recently budding contemplations that have “Dead End” dangling from them. I think because I am (alive). I am (alive) because I think. So, to think is to be. If for one day I chose not to think, I would have chosen death.

Hence, at the end of the day it doesn’t matter if people want to hear my thoughts. I want to live. Eso nomas. 

***So if you just read my blog and don't care about my thoughts, thank you. You've simply added to my life.***
---Have a great day.---

Sleep chronicle: Daily report on sleeping patterns

Ay friend. What it do?

As I mentioned in a previous blog post (I've Got It Twisted), I am chronicling my sleeping hours, the effects and what not till I get to a place where I'm sleeping 7-9 hours regularly (I don't think I've slept that much in a while. Problematic.)
I'm doing this, not because I think sleep is the most important part of my life, but because I am very aware of the fact that I am not effective, listening to God or responsive when I have little-to-no sleep. In Psalm 4:8, sleep is associated with peace, which is what God provides. I want peace.

So here goes. Let me know if you have any suggestions!

Day 1--5 hours. Woke up late. Didn't do devotions. Dozed off in two of my classes. By 5:00pm I wasn't taking any intellectual information in or being responsive to questions. I lost my train of thought really quickly and forgot what people said just as quickly. I might be getting sick. I don't know yet. Took a 1.5 hour nap during the day. Missed LG and got a bit behind on hw. Physically felt drained and not alert at all. 3:30am-8:15am.

Day 2--6 hours. Wrote an Arabic paper/did devotions. Struggled to stay awake in class and at work, but stayed awake. Didn't take a nap, but really wanted to skip class to take one. Physically felt weighed down with my lack of energy and sleep. 2am-8:15am

Day 3--6.5 hours. Did devotions (for 10 min). "Did" my Arabic hw and was NOT late to class. I stayed awake in my second class (IC) until the very end, but it was better than the last class. I still felt tired, but sat down a rested for a while. I took a 2.0 hour nap during the day, missed an event I wanted to really go to. :Sad day: 1am-7:30am

Day 4--6.5 hours 1:30am-8am

Day 5--6 hours 45 min. 1:45am-8:30am. Wanted to nap.

Day 6--~6 hours  2:10am-8:30am. Felt good and engaged today. Took a 1hr nap, but it wasn't too long and that was sufficient. I was pooped by the end of the day, but that might have been because I was running around all day.

Day 7--~7 hours 12:30am-5:00am, 6:45am-8:45am. No nap. Felt really good all day. Didn't feel tired though my sleep was broken up. Didn't start feeling sleepy till after 1pm. Very productive day with hw and relaxation. Stayed awake for the most part in church.

Day 8--~7 hours1:45am-8:40am  Woke up late, but got ready in <15 min.

I've got it twisted

Yo, so God is working on me in not getting my priorities twisted.

I fell asleep amidst my homework around 1-ish in the AM, then woke up around 3-ish 'cause sleeping in my clothes was uncomfortable. Then, I didn't fall back asleep till 7am. Missed church and am now here listening to a sermon online (not that this is bad, but church is a place to share in community what God is doing in His kingdom through us).

I totally have my priorities twisted and with God's help it'll be worked out. Henceforth, I'll share a bit about my progress on priorities and sleep  progress. If only I can convince myself that sleeping is necessary...

Deuces. I'm out.

Do you have your priorities straightened out? Share so we pray in this together!

Breakfast anyone?

Howdy partner!

It's me. Tanguina Tina. Just chillin' with God and seeing what's good with you. It has been a while since I last blogged, but I'm here to remedy this and provide another post showing how ballin' Jesus is.

Alright, I really wish Jesus could come back in the flesh at times because in this passage (John 21:1-23), He hooked up the disciples with breakfast! How sweet it that? Village Brunch is great and all, but with the type of inspiration Jesus has, that breakfast would be Campbell delicious--mmm mmm gooood!

Breakfast: http://92q.com/bmore/kiki/motivational-minute-never-skip-breakfast/

[So Ife, what does breakfast have to do with this?] I'm glad you asked. Let me set the table AKA the scene.

We approach this table after Jesus just finished some miracles. NBD. He also just finished showing His wounds to Thomas, the doubter (Jesus didn't get much lovin' from him in this passage). Thomas was trippin' because Jesus hadn't showed Himself to him personally and he was being difficult: "Unless I see the nail marks in his hands and put my finger where the nails were, and put my hand into his side, I will not believe." Really though? Did he just say put my fingers in his side? WHY? (gross). But Thomas was that serious.

Am I asking God for signs in order to believe or have I discounted His existence?


Then Jesus shows up, shows out (in the most peaceful, caring manner) and let's Thomas check Him out. Case closed. Thomas believes that Jesus is living. So what's the next step? FISHING!?!? This was most of the disciples' occupation so they had to go to work at night, when the fish were sleeping and in their calm state (optimal time for fish catching--early early morning or super late night...they really might be the same). But dun dun dun. They catch nothing.

Zilch.  
     Zipo.  
          Nada. 
                Cifer. 
                      Zero. 
                           Nil. 
                              Null.
                                   Nothing... you get the picture.

These are professionals in their field, probably learned from the best in fishing, have been doing it for so long,  it ain't no thing. But they caught nothing. They had no results for their labor.

In what ways do I labor in my "specialty" and see no results, at least the results I expect?


Then Jesus steps in, gives them a few suggestions and vuala! FISH! Not just a few, but a "large number of fish". 153 to be exact. They brought the fish in and Jesus had hooked up a nice cooking fire, fish and some bread. Breakfast anyone?

Jesus fed them. He provided them with what they needed at the right time. They might have been having a fit when they didn't get results. "I'm a professional fisher. I catch fish. That's what I do."

This is one of the reasons Jesus came to Earth, to keep us from laboring, struggling in vain. He wants to guide us, give us some great insight in life and provide us breakfast. But this didn't happen the way the disciples expected. Let's not continue in vain struggle and toiling, but instead let Jesus set us up to enjoy the labor our fruits by doing what He asks. Say 'no' to the stress, 'no' to the struggle, 'no' to the pointless labor and say 'yes' to breakfast from Jesus.

So, are you going to let Jesus hook you up with breakfast?


Much love, peace, and breakfast grease (yummm),
         Ife 'Quipayan' S.

P.S. I'm pretty pumped to apply to some of my after college applications and such. I hope to be teaching English in another country for a few years before going to grad school. I wonder if that's actually what God has planned. But, I'm actually hungry, so I'mma grab some brunch. Deuces.

Not against flesh and blood

Dear Enemy,

I'm calling you out on your mess.

I'm calling you out on your lies.

I'm calling you out on your deception.

I'm calling you out on your wratchedness.

I'm calling you out.

I'm calling you out because you really had me going for a sec.

When you had convinced me that nothing I did would succeed.

You're right.

That's why I'm giving my mind, heart and soul to the One who makes all things possible.

I'm calling you out because you really screwed with my mind.

When you had me convinced that my friends didn't care for me.

You were wrong.

So, I'm committing them and myself into the hands of the One is who is Father to the fatherless.

I'm calling you out because you really had me walking around blind.

When you had me convinced that some people didn't deserve my time.

You were wrong.

Now I'm dropping the games and showing the love of the ultimate Lover.

I'm calling you out for every broken relationship you had me thinking had no remedy.

I'm calling you out for every single day I walked arounding hiding in shame.

I'm calling you out for the times I was too afraid to share the good news.

I'm calling you out because, quite frankly, you need Jesus. Just sayin'.

So, enemy. You've had your time in the limelight, but I'm taking it back.

I have the authority that has been given to me by the King.

I am royalty.

I am loved.

I am unstoppable.

I am adored.

Don't look at me like you've got this in the bag.

This community belongs to my Father.

Sleeves are being rolled up.

People are getting serious.

Play your games (you're wasting your time).

Speak your lies (you're wasting your breath).

But enough is enough.

"For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms." Ephesians 6:12

Livin' life to its fullest

Ya'll sin is no joke.

Read Ephesians 5: 1-10.

I know I've made light of sin before saying "It's my weakness" or "That's my thorn." But that is killing me.

Do you know who you are? As kids of the Heavenly Father, we are taken away from the darkness and placed into the light. The darkness is an indicator of the wrongs we've committed that separate us from true love and the light is how we are made whole again, how we are brought back to life.

John 1:4 "In him was life and this life was the light of men."

John 8:12 "When Jesus spoke again to the people, he said, "I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life."

Livin' life!

Basically what the Words of God are saying is that there is no one we can say we are receiving our life from God if we are not in the light, if we are not separating ourselves from the darkness, if we are continuing with the wrong doings that are stripping us of life.

John 10: 10 " The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full"

The only way we can have life to the fullest, is if we are in the light. The Bible clearly lays it out, but I have to be reminded that life comes from being in the wonderful light that only Jesus provides, otherwise, I'm just walking around in the darkness. Blindly.

So, go. Live life to its fullest. Be in the Light.

Much love, peace and livin' grease,

     Ife 'Quipayan' S.

P.S. It's 9:36am and I have Arabic class in 24 minutes. Gotta bounce! Ma'Salama!

Do you remember?

Oh heeeey friend. Whatchoo doin'? Reading my blog? Wow. You're cool. B)

I want to warn you that this post ends with a rather sweet song, but don't go to the end first: READ this!

If you're wondering what I'm reading, wait no longer:

Psalm 103:1-14

Reading this passage was truly fulfilling as I went away to a conference this weekend and the one thing (out of several) that I gained with the choice I make to thank God and give Him his dues when I'm focused on negative things in life or how sour things are turning. Example: This past Friday, I was in a funk that had me torn, the most torn and stressed that I've ever felt over the span of 24 hours. Inconceivable how fragile I felt. I cried ever few hours, sighed in contempt for life at school and just overall had a weird funk face (the one when everyone knows that something is terribly wrong--can't even fake happiness). Thankfully, God threw all of my friends in my path that day to give me great advice....or was it just to remind me that He loves me? I didn't take their advice. BUT, I did realize how not alone I was though I sometimes felt it. So shout out to Sara B., Yan S, Mommy, Daddy, Genna M., Kelsey B., Cheyenne O., Erin W., Daphne W., Marcia M., and everyone else. You all helped me get through the day. Seriously.

So, when I got to the conference I was semi still in the funk, but on Saturday God reminded me, through a Spanish song (!!!), that I need to praise Him in las buenas y en las malas (In the good and the bad). I had forgotten how much He loves me and all the great things He does for me. I had forgotten. 

The passage in vs. 2 says "Praise the Lord, O my soul and forget not all His benefits." I want to remember how he "forgives", he "heals", "redeems", "works", "makes known his ways". I had forgotten. In the good and in the bad, let us not forget what God has done. Not only to remember, but to praise Him for it. 

So, Do You Remember?

Much love, peace and remembering grease,
      Ife 'Quipayan' S.

The Remedy

Oh HEEEEY beautiful reader!


I just want to share these lyrics with you. Today, things panned out in a way I would NOT have imagined. After deciding not to skip a class and own up to my actions (possibly resulting in the loss of a potential position for next year), God still showed me His mercy. I figure I don't deserve it because I mess life up in different ways quite frequently, but the type of security I have in Him remains unshaken. 


Jesus is the only remedy to my craziness. 'The Remedy' by Ayiesha Woods.

A little too much time on your hand
So many things pressing your heart
Now you're caught up in a brain storm
And the winds are tearing you apart
And what matter the most now
Shouldn't matter at all
You forgot who's holding you up
And He won't let you fall

Who's in control of your life
And knows better than you ever will
Who tells you time and again
Hush and be still
It's time to recognize
That your answer in His eyes
Where the river flows If you'll just

Free your mind
And the peace of God will follow
Just give yourself a little time
Don't worry 'bout tomorrow

Don't you know that His joy is your strength
Can you fathom it
Peace beyond your understanding
When you gonna grab a hold of it
Cause you're life's not your own
You can't do it alone
There is a remedy if you will let go and just...

Free your mind
And the peace of God will follow
Just give yourself a little time
Don't worry 'bout tomorrow

Don't you know just thinking about it,
Ain't gonna add one hour
Tell me who's in control

'God, I am grateful for the fact that you're NOT human. You work things out in the most perfect way ever and kick in when I've thrown in the towel. You never give up on me which is great because I gave up on myself around 5:45am this morning. I'm sure my family sometimes wants to give up on me, but because you are YOU, that's just not the case. Not trying to take this for granted, so I'm here to say thank you for all you do on my behalf.'

Much love, peace and thankfulness grease,

    Ife 'Quipayan' S.

P.S. It's Tuesday! Yay!

Dream a little dream

What is your latest dream?


[Insert Ife's latest dream here. It's top secret. Can't have EVERYONE knowing.]


I was looking up quotes about dreaming on the internet and found a few of these quotes by a few lesser known peeps and a few by the greats.

"A person starts dying when they stop dreaming."-Brian Williams

"But the delights of solitude don't only consist of dreaming. Next in enjoyment, I think, comes planning." Anna Neagle 

"A man is not old until regrets take the place of dreams."-John Barrymore

"A man is but the product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes." -Mohandas K. Gandhi

"I have had dreams and I have had nightmares, but I have conquered my nightmares because of my dreams." -Jonas Salk

"But God speaks again and again, though people do not recognize it. He speaks in dreams, in visions of the night when deep sleep falls on people as they lie in bed. He whispers in their ear and terrifies them with his warning. He causes them to change their minds; he keeps them from pride. He keeps them from the grave, from crossing over the river of death." Job 33: 14-18

Basically what I'm saying is that dreams are important and significant. When we stop dreaming, I think we lose a very crucial balance between our realities and imaginations. Life doesn't stop when we start sleeping, but instead, this is what drives us to continue. I'm not saying anything new, but simply emphasizing that (even as adults) we should continue to dream: in the literal sense and abstract one as well. 


Whenever people ask of what I want to do after college, I used to tell them what I thought they wanted to hear, but I realized that my dreams (o sea the dreams that God has given me) are bigger than what people can define me to. My life and the events in it used to be driven by my dreams, but now I've gotten stuck and to be stuck is to not see what lies ahead. If I see the great things that lie ahead, I'll do whatever possible to not get stuck. Trust.


Aight, I'm done. Do what you must, but whatever you do, keep dreaming.


Much love, peace, and dreaming grease,
      Ife 'Quipayan' S. 


P.S. I'm super excited about the rest of this year because I now realize that the real world cannot offer what I'm going to experience/what I have experience in college, so I better live it up! Going rock climbing today and out with some amigas for a birthday celebration!

Consequences of cabin fever

Oh splendid, splendid reader. You are the delightful surprise at the end of lull-inducing day.

I do a lot of self examination. (Nothing too deep otherwise I'll find something about myself that disgusts me).

 Life has been quite interesting for me. I've spent a lot of time trying to figure out what I want my last year at WashU to be like and what I'd like to spend my last year doing.

And I've come to a conclusion: I want to spend my last year doing things that I love! Now, this is all rather relative because I can only do things that I love once I've gotten past doing things that I may not love. Ejemplo: I'd love to spend every moment singing, dancing or acting, but in order for that to happen, I have to do hw so I don't fail out of school.

However, there just isn't enough time in the day to do all that. What to do?? This is where I am now. How in the world is it possible to get all this done?

-----Also, I've become rather pessimistic these past few days. It's quite the problem. I barely even notice it either, that's how bad it is. I know when it started, but I can't credit that one incident to my recent outlook on life. Story: I read an article in StudLife today about how WashU's ranking dropped from being 13th to 14th (essentially breaking the tie between itself and another university). My reaction was to laugh. I laughed at what I thought was a stupid system of grading universities and how trivial this article seemed. I also attributed this decline to the students at the school. I feel like each year is less intelligent than the previous...or are we all just kidding ourselves in our level of intellectualism? But really though. The people here don't seem that much more intelligent that people I know elsewhere who attend non-ranked universities. -------

I have cabin fever and I want to get out. So badly. People at WashU are making me so upset it's crazy. I've never felt this way before and I hope it goes away otherwise I'mma get a 4.0 and peace out without doing much or enjoying my last year. I kinda don't care at this moment. I really just don't care. Unfortunately.

I may have dug too deep.

Let's be honest with ourselves....

Student-Morning-Dread syndrome

"Teach us to number our days aright, that we may gain a heart of wisdom."

I'm a senior in college!!! 3 years of experience under my belt and you would think I've figured it all out.

False. 

I woke up early and the first thing I felt was fear and disdain for my lifestyle as a student (late nights, early mornings, half-baked assignments, no breakfast, 4 hours of work ahead, strange smells in the kitchen etc). Those emotions, for me, create a cycle of being stuck and not knowing or desiring to move forward. I hate those moments. What makes it worse is when I can't catch a break to figure it all out. When I have that break, I just want to sleep (but really though). I call this the SMD (Student-Morning-Dread) syndrome. Define it however you like.

La vuelta al cole/ Back to school sales

Tonterías en vertical: [La vuelta al cole]

I love school...and can't get enough of back to school sales, but because I am on a budget, I didn't get all the things I wanted to. I'd rather go to Nigeria than spend $4.00 on a fancy pen, cachai?

So, enjoy this blog en español (which includes drawings!! My favorite).

Good night and much love.

Ife 'Quipayan' S.

Jesus and I. We're like this: &

"If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from His love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose. Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourself. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interest of others. Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus: Who, being in the very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking on the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance as a human, he humbled himself and became obedient to death---even death on a cross! Therefore God exalted him to the highest place and gave him the name that is above every other name, that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord to the glory of God the Father."

Philippians 2:1-11. I thought focusing on the entire passage would be too much, but after reading it over and over and over and over, etc, I realized that there is something about this passage that forces me to see the overview of who my Savior was and is.

It talks about what Paul would like to see in those who claim Jesus Christ as their Lord (Christians) and then it talks about the actions and humility of Jesus. I don't know about you, but when I think of Jesus, I tend to separate Him from me. We generally don't exist on the same page. Yes, I talk to Him. Yes, I read His Word. However, the idea of including myself and Jesus in the same line rarely comes up. But  Paul makes that connection because of the way Christ lives in us.

'Unity with Christ. Fellowship with the Spirit.' Here we establish the fact that Christ does not desire for a long-distance relationship. No way! He wants to kick it with you and your friends at the movies and sit with you in class. He wants to love you and be your friend. In this, we are united with Christ. And in our unity, we [need to] reflect the nature of Christ himself, this humble guy that figured dying was the only way to give me life. Go figure.

'He humbled himself. Therefore God exalted him.' These phrases reflect the nature of Christ Jesus. That means that if this is what Chris is doing, then this is what I need to be doing. No, I am not Jesus Christ, but by being one with Him, I should humble myself. In doing so, Christ exalts me.  <--that can be further explained another time.

Sooo...long story short: Jesus and I are united (friends!) thus, we share similar traits (humility)---at least we should.

It's a work in progress, but I know that it will happen. I can get there. Claim it. Pray about it. Work on being one with Christ. (If you need assistance, holla atcha home giiiirl 'cause I then can point you to the Bibliaaaaa).

I'm out. Deuces.

Much love, peace and unity grease,
    Ife 'Quipayan' S.

P.S. I'm getting ready for my Spanish TA interview process. ?Hablas español? Chuta.

She got soft

I'm sitting in my dorm room thinking about what I want from this year in college. It's my last and I'm semi-scared that I won't do everything I want to do or fortify the friendships I hold so dear to me. (The following has nothing to do with this).

Reconcile

There are some things in life that are simply difficult:

• Learning how to ride a bike
• Losing a friend/family member
• Being BROKE!
• Waiting
• Being sincere about asking for forgiveness

The latter is what this passage (Genesis 32:1-5) focuses on. These 5 verses outline how Jacob went about reconciling with his brosky. The thing is that he was in the wrrrrong! Like, the farthest point from right. That's where Jacob was. 

(Some history: Jacob and Esau are brothers. Esau is older. Jacob is a thief. Jacob stole Esau's birthright and the blessing that is reserved for the firstborn. Jacob is a con man. He tricked his own daddy into thinking that he was Esau so he could get all this. Jacob is in the wrong.

Ladies and Gents...this is HUGE. Imagine having a relative falsify their identity to be you and then take ALL the $$ that was left for you!!! How would you feel? Precisely. Esau swore to kill his brother. Jacob is a coward. He ran away to live with his uncle for 20 years, who is also a con man; it runs in the family obviously.)

Back to the story: So God tells Jacob, enough is enough. He has got to reconcile with his brother...20 years later. He could have simply forgotten about the who ordeal and kept living his life...far, far, far away from his brother. BUT....that's not the way things turned out. He:

1. Traveled long miles to his brother's hood--initiated the process
2. Sent a message calling his brother 'my master' and himself 'your servant'--he humbled himself
3. He expressed that he hoped to "find favor in your [Esau's] eyes"--he sincerely asked for forgiveness

Honestly, I have a hard time with asking for forgiveness, especially after such a long time. I like to think time heals, but the steps Jacob took led him to having a great relationship with his brother and expresses what God wants for us in our relationships. God heals.

There are people I've never asked forgiveness from (though I really don't think it was ALL my fault) and probably should; who are those people for you? Take some time to think about it and what steps do you need to take to reconcile.

Much love, peace, and reconciliation grease,

       Ife 'Quipayan' S.

P.S.I'm all moved in here at school. But I feel like I've been here forever (I got in two days ago). I have sooo much to do before Tuesday (classes begin!). Yikes. Pray for me!

Late night?

Ya'll I'm tired, hungry and awake. Not sure which to consider, but I'd really like to say hello to those who read my blogs!

You make me happy. Really though. Leave comments/feedback on them so I get a good understanding of your thoughts!

I love reading them, so comment away!!

-Good night and God bless.

   Deuces

DIY

I've wasted so much time this morning.

Yo (it's 9:09am and I've been up for an hour! That is only Jesus. I haven't done a whole lot, but I've been up.)

Basically what I gained from my devotions this morning was that when God calls me to do something or to go on a mission (ooh so serious), He provides me with all the necessary tools and gadgets I need. Ain't that something?

The passage is from Mark 6: 30-44. Jesus Feeds the 500 with just 5 loaves and 3 fishes.

Scenario: The disciples were kickin' it with Jesus, listening to His stories and all the knowledge He was dropping. But, clearly, that knowledge was just so fly that others got wind of it and started gathering to hear too (share the wealth)! The disciples and Jesus decided that, after some time, it was time to go. So, they left....to rest and debrief maybe?
    But, the people still followed! Tough.

    Nevertheless, Jesus was not going to turn them away. They followed Him to this remote area of the city and there was no turning back. It had gotten late and dinner was OVA'. They missed it. All 500 of them so that they could hear J.C. talk. :Tummy rumbles: Yep, someone was hungry and one of the intelligent disciples suggested, "Send the people away so that they can go to the surrounding countryside and villages and buy themselves something to eat."

"FEED THEM" Jesus said.

"Jesus say what?" the disciples responded.

Jesus wasn't trying to play jokes. He really wanted the disciples, those that noticed the need, to fill it. Do it yourself. The disciples found out that there were 5 loaves of bread and 3 fish (es). The need could be filled.

There was a need. Jesus wants me to fill it. He provides the things I need to fill it.Then He does His stuff. In this scenario, it was the multiplication of those 8 items into thousands of items.....and then some.

The mission (oo so serious) He calls me for is never unorganized, ill-prepared or a spur of the moment. If I need a gun, He provides it (J.C. does not endorse violence of evil nature). If I need a map, it's there. But He is asking me to go on that mission (oo so serious) and be His hands and feet when He calls me to Do it myself.

So, go on a mission (oo so...never mind). Fill those needs and be sure to know that Jesus will provide all you need. Just do it (not endorsed by Nike)!

Much love, peace and mission grease,

     Ife 'Quipayan' S.

P.S. School is around the corner and I've gotta get ready for work. Yesterday, Tofe turned 17 and there were more boys in my house than I have seen in a while! Ooh. I need to go back to schoooool!



All I Do Is Win

Isaiah 41:17-20 Read this. Then read the blog.

Good day, mates! Welcome, again, to LIGHTING THE PATH! :applause: As you may know, I like to write, but am not that good. You may also know that I have work at 10:30am and it is now 8:44am...so, I unfortunately will make this quick. Rapid writing and less-than writing don't make for a great combination, but I have a secret weapon...I'm writing about the Bible! What?!?! Yes. La Biblia. Check it.


So, I read that quick passage (it's a shortie, so read it if you haven't).First thought: God is definitely flexing His muscles in this one. It reminded me of magicians that say things that we all think to be impossible: "I will make this deck of cards disappear!" Crowd is normally half skeptical and half trying to figure out how IN THE WORLD will he do it. At least, that's the way I think.

But, unlike magicians, there is no trick factor with God. There is no 'here's how I do it' segment. He just does it. Time after time. Day after day. And in this passage, He says "I will turn the desert into pools of water, and the parched ground into springs." (Are you skeptic? How does He do it?!)

This is God winning. How? Because He does it all the time and when He does, it makes people realize His greatness. When this happens, some sort of understanding takes place that what God is doing is definitely not a human thing; it must be a God thing. And that's the beginning of a great relationship. #winning.

When you decide that winning is what you want to do, take time to read this passage if you haven't already and converse with God about how you can start winning, winning through His strength. It's a God thing.

*All I Do Is Win*

Alright, mates. Chao for now.

Much love, peace and #winning grease,

      Ife 'Quipayan' S.

P.S. School starts in two weeks. GET HYPE!

Psych yourself up

Well, howdie there.
Welcome to my blog! Thanks for taking the time out to read. It's pretty sweet that you found it (or stumbled across it)! I'm glad you're here. But hold your horses; you have to keep reading to get the gist of this blog here.

Psalm 77: 11-20.

Have you ever tried to psych yourself out? As in, you're feeling one way, but you're telling yourself to feel another or do another? That's what the psalmist did in this passage. At least that's what it looks like to me. I started reading the passage from 11 onward and thought, "Wow! This writer sure sounds happy to have God in his life." Maybe, or he's really sad.

The verses beforehand, the ones I hadn't read, are pretty sad and anguish-filled. The psalmist was probably crying his eyes out. He says "my soul refused to be comforted." If feel that this could be as sad as it gets. Not only was he distressed, but his own soul was troubled! Snaps.

That is the general tone of the 9 verses.

But.....there is a twist!

In verse 10 he says this: "Then I thought, 'To this I will appeal: the years of the right hand of the Most High." A light turns on in his head where I tries a new approach to begging God for a change in his life. He remembers the good.

By remembering the good, he psyches himself out to forget the awful. He makes the decision to appeal to God's grace in his life. I would have kept moping and producing waterfalls. But seriously though.

Let's remember "the deeds of the Lord: yes...remember [His] miracles of long ago." This is how we appeal to God's kindness and mercy in our lives. For troubles will always come, but once we make the decision to recall the great things God has done, we psych ourselves up, but not on false promises or works, but on true, longstanding acts of the Creator of the heavens and the earths.

Ya'll it's been real. Much love, peace and remembering grease,

Ife  'Quipayan' S.

In Christ Alone

Yo, homies and homettes (is that even a word?)!

I'm writing you today to talk about my relationship...with Jesus.
Through reading 2 Corinthians 5:21, which says...

         God made Him who had no sin, be sin for us so that in Him we might become  the righteousness of God.


...and I thought it was super powerful because it emphasizes the fact that my righteousness is only through Christ. All of what I may have tried to build my life upon is solely based on the decision that God made to sacrifice His only Son so that I might be blameless before His sight.

God will not stand sin...and neither should I, but I do this because of the person of Jesus Christ; for in Him alone my hope is found.

A list of things that make me wanna scream

1. When people constantly interrupt.
2. When people think it's okay to talk extremely loud into my ear.
3. When people behave and handle situations like they are incapable of getting over themselves.
4. When people act in creepy ways.
5. When I fail at life in the same ways
6. When people lie to my face. It just sucks. Especially when they want to prove their point.

Upon starting this list, I thought I felt justified in creating it. But it's just that life's not perfect. It really isn't, and the crazy thing is that I don't want to be part of that imperfection. It sucks. It sucks that when I think things should be going well, it doesn't. When I think I'm done for the day, the work never stops. It just never stops and my issue is that I am not one to forget things. I do forget a lot, but if it's something that I haven't done, that will stay on my head. And the truth of the matter is, I don't want to do it. I really don't. Today was a lazy day and that is all I wanted it to be. That is not what it was. Yes, I spent a good portion of the day doing what I wanted and yes I was glad to get some things done, but whenever I come back to the house and there are more and more people who need taking care of, I really just want to leave because the work just never stops.

When I grow up, this can't be it. The house is so out of whack, and to be frank, I really don't feel obligated to put it together. These are not my kids and this is not my responsibility. The honest truth. I am so aware of the things that should be done in this life and the work that people put into many things, but once I start realizing all the stuff that needs to be changed or rearranged in this house and someone else broke it..or messed it up, I stop caring.

Uh. I need a boost and not so many people. They can be draining. Especially the adults. But whatever. I'll get over it. I need to quit with the self-help books. Makes me realize how not-perfect I am. I don't need any of that besides the bible.

Great Goodness

Bonjour ladies and gents.

Today's blog/devotional will be a quickie because I've come to realize that I spend more time blogging and less time listening to God. So here goes:

God is good. I don't know if this is obvious for you, but there are definitely times when I forget just how good He is. I am reading Psalm 92 and the whole thing is praise to  God by David explaining just how amazing God is. For what He has done and for who He is.

----This semester has been one of the best for me. There are lots of reasons why, but I'd rather take this moment to praise God instead of rattle off things I think I did well.------
       I got a 3.77 GPA this semester which I thought wouldn't be because everyone says that the semester after study abroad would be the hardest because of the culture shock. Boy did God shock me! God is good because He does not limit Himself to our expectations, He surpasses them!
       I built good friendships with people I care about, not just with people with whom I have a friendship. Through a semester program called MOmentum, I learned about the intensity of love that God has for my campus and how I need to be the one that shares that love with others. God is good because God is love.
----That's is all I'll be sharing for now. I have work in an hour and want to spend a bit longer in God's presence. Love you all and please pray for me. This summer is still up in the air.-------

Much love, peace and goodness grease,
              Ife S.

My sin

Hey Hey Hey!

Okay, this is actually a devotional that I really like because it pertains to what I've been struggling with since I was conceived: sin. Sin is my addiction and my sin has not been properly dealt with.

I am reading from James 1:13-22 and the verse that stuck out to me was verse 14 that outlines exactly what temptation is. I know I can let you know where temptation comes from, but this verse takes a step by step process to explain exactly we are tempted:

1. It starts from our evil desires being lured.
2. Then the evil desires turn into evil actions
3. And then those evil actions lead to death.

The one thing that I will say is that sometimes what I convince myself that are godly desires, are really evil ones. Like when I convince myself  by saying some guy is wonderfully made by God and my obsession with him is me appreciating God's creature, I obviously have taken what could have been something simple and not complex to another level. I am feeding my evil desire and letting myself be tempted. If I proceed to act on those desires by texting him 24 hours of the day (complete exaggeration), then I have let my temptation lead to sin. He has become an idol; something that takes my focus from God.

Well, I gotta go. My shift is at 12pm and it's quarter till.

I'll come back to this later :) Chao. God's grace is sufficient for me, but I have to stop continuing in sin that grace may abound.

Passion Moments

Hi.

Don't know who exactly is on the receiving end of this blog, but I just wanted to put this out there.

I'm in a funk.

Yes, that is correct. In a really sticky funk that hasn't allowed me space or time to study for my finals. It's the type of funk that gnaws where it hurts, almost enough to cry in exasperation, but instead you begin fumming or whining because enough is enough.You'd rather forget that you're in a funk that work your way out of it.

That's where I am. At this very moment. In a funk.

Now this funk, mind you, was not doing, nor do I want to stay within its hold any longer 'cause I really need to get to work.

"What is this funk?" you ask. Good question. Answer?

                   It's about my future. Yea, my future. The future that I thought I knew about since when I was 6 years old and proclaimed myself a lawyer. What went wrong?

(By writing about this funk, I am not truly dealing with it. I'll do that when my mom calls back. She doesn't realize how sticky this funk is.)

I am just tired of thinking that I know what I want to know and then looking around me and realizing I don't. I usually comes after seeing someone else that appears to have their life all worked out. That used to be me. I used to know what exactly I wanted to know, and if I didn't, I faked it. I did and it worked to keep me together until recently.

I don't want to fake it anymore, but I've lost so much of what I do want to do that faking it is all/almost all I know. I had sworn off being a lawyer because it was not my decision. Everyone said I'd do something great and I want to do that something, but it's so hard when I'd rather just live in a different country and help little children to make better lives for themselves.

I'm a complex person. I don't make sense, but to me it all makes sense. I'm confused. I'm really confused. What went wrong? God, what went wrong.

I'm done. I can't even finish this blog.

God, I just want to finish this paper and take my exams. I am tired of the funk. Cause it sucks...really badly.

Lighting the Path-It's famous!

Just kidding.

It's not famous, but today's devotion comes from Psalm 119:105, the verse that gave birth to this blog.

So, here's the link. Enjoy and you'll see why this verse is quite important and relates to life: I don't know much about my future, but with God's word as a means to 'light my path' I can trust it and depend on it to show me what I need to know in this life. One day at a time.

Thanks for readddddinnnng!

You rock my socks!

Ife S.

P.S. My laptop mouse pad is on the fritz. Not fun.