Great Goodness

Bonjour ladies and gents.

Today's blog/devotional will be a quickie because I've come to realize that I spend more time blogging and less time listening to God. So here goes:

God is good. I don't know if this is obvious for you, but there are definitely times when I forget just how good He is. I am reading Psalm 92 and the whole thing is praise to  God by David explaining just how amazing God is. For what He has done and for who He is.

----This semester has been one of the best for me. There are lots of reasons why, but I'd rather take this moment to praise God instead of rattle off things I think I did well.------
       I got a 3.77 GPA this semester which I thought wouldn't be because everyone says that the semester after study abroad would be the hardest because of the culture shock. Boy did God shock me! God is good because He does not limit Himself to our expectations, He surpasses them!
       I built good friendships with people I care about, not just with people with whom I have a friendship. Through a semester program called MOmentum, I learned about the intensity of love that God has for my campus and how I need to be the one that shares that love with others. God is good because God is love.
----That's is all I'll be sharing for now. I have work in an hour and want to spend a bit longer in God's presence. Love you all and please pray for me. This summer is still up in the air.-------

Much love, peace and goodness grease,
              Ife S.

My sin

Hey Hey Hey!

Okay, this is actually a devotional that I really like because it pertains to what I've been struggling with since I was conceived: sin. Sin is my addiction and my sin has not been properly dealt with.

I am reading from James 1:13-22 and the verse that stuck out to me was verse 14 that outlines exactly what temptation is. I know I can let you know where temptation comes from, but this verse takes a step by step process to explain exactly we are tempted:

1. It starts from our evil desires being lured.
2. Then the evil desires turn into evil actions
3. And then those evil actions lead to death.

The one thing that I will say is that sometimes what I convince myself that are godly desires, are really evil ones. Like when I convince myself  by saying some guy is wonderfully made by God and my obsession with him is me appreciating God's creature, I obviously have taken what could have been something simple and not complex to another level. I am feeding my evil desire and letting myself be tempted. If I proceed to act on those desires by texting him 24 hours of the day (complete exaggeration), then I have let my temptation lead to sin. He has become an idol; something that takes my focus from God.

Well, I gotta go. My shift is at 12pm and it's quarter till.

I'll come back to this later :) Chao. God's grace is sufficient for me, but I have to stop continuing in sin that grace may abound.

Passion Moments

Hi.

Don't know who exactly is on the receiving end of this blog, but I just wanted to put this out there.

I'm in a funk.

Yes, that is correct. In a really sticky funk that hasn't allowed me space or time to study for my finals. It's the type of funk that gnaws where it hurts, almost enough to cry in exasperation, but instead you begin fumming or whining because enough is enough.You'd rather forget that you're in a funk that work your way out of it.

That's where I am. At this very moment. In a funk.

Now this funk, mind you, was not doing, nor do I want to stay within its hold any longer 'cause I really need to get to work.

"What is this funk?" you ask. Good question. Answer?

                   It's about my future. Yea, my future. The future that I thought I knew about since when I was 6 years old and proclaimed myself a lawyer. What went wrong?

(By writing about this funk, I am not truly dealing with it. I'll do that when my mom calls back. She doesn't realize how sticky this funk is.)

I am just tired of thinking that I know what I want to know and then looking around me and realizing I don't. I usually comes after seeing someone else that appears to have their life all worked out. That used to be me. I used to know what exactly I wanted to know, and if I didn't, I faked it. I did and it worked to keep me together until recently.

I don't want to fake it anymore, but I've lost so much of what I do want to do that faking it is all/almost all I know. I had sworn off being a lawyer because it was not my decision. Everyone said I'd do something great and I want to do that something, but it's so hard when I'd rather just live in a different country and help little children to make better lives for themselves.

I'm a complex person. I don't make sense, but to me it all makes sense. I'm confused. I'm really confused. What went wrong? God, what went wrong.

I'm done. I can't even finish this blog.

God, I just want to finish this paper and take my exams. I am tired of the funk. Cause it sucks...really badly.