Monday, April 29, 2013

Tents at the Crossroads

It's time, yes another time, to delve into the undramatic life of Ife S. Despite the long hiatus, sabbatical, I am back here to stay! : applause:

Thank you, thank you for the warm welcome. I've missed you all dearly and, to be honest, I don't remember why I haven't been more up to do. But, it's alright; life happens.

These past few months (8 months to be exact) of living back at home have been so overwhelming at times and underwhelming at others. If I could wrap up this period of my life and illustrate it in a picture, it would be winding roads and pathways that lead off the page, into the great unknown.

The unknown was never a scary place for me. I would purposely hit my tennis balls into the forest (basically bushes and trees in the park) just so that I could have an adventure in the great wild! Even from my tiny tots days, I would leap into great waters (the local swimming pool) hoping to run into a shark so that I could implement the most epic escape ever. I dreamt of daring stunts and running from wolves, zig-zagging between trees to reach the edge of the mountain's cliff and leap into the sun free falling to the earth and landing unscathed. That was the me that delighted in the unknown.

But now...

    now, the unknown is my crippling enemy. That kryptonite to my Superwoman power, the Delilah to my Samson strength,

And I am fed up of the fear. I do blame the people around me though. It is 80-20, with me carrying only a slight fault in my current state. They filled my head with 'what ifs' and 'think again' and 'no' and 'are you sure?'. I never stood at crossroads for very long. I was always making choices and willingly living with whatever consequences, good or bad, because I knew why and was okay with that. Nevertheless, these days I spend most of my time picnicking at the crossroad, watching people go by and constantly turning around to see if my past will help me figure out the future.

Friends, this is not a good place to camp, or sink your roots. Not a good place at all.

Next installment, fixing this issue. Until then, sayanora!